Just bl**dy piss!

I could be referring to a few things but I'm not,

It could be my new job, admittedly I've been at it for almost three weeks now I still don't really know what I'm supposed to be doing. I know I'm the marketing manager for the premium product ranges in Asia but as to day to day deliverables, really not so sure. I tried asking my boss but he didn't seem to know, he asked the chairwoman but alas she was equally in the dark so I guess I'll just have to blag it, but everyone’s really nice and I've been given a laptop and mobile so can't complain.

Some doubters may say the mighty mighty England aren't doing there job but they'd be wrong. They keep winning at the world cup and therefore are still keeping me up until the early hours and all without wasting an ounce of effort. And me playing isn't a problem either, admittedly my team is still useless however, last Saturday I’m proud to say, as one of two gwylows on the pitch (I took Sean along) I scored not one but two 'special' goals in the 35 degree heat.

And the couple of boat trips I was 'forced' into taking recently, one on a junk with a giant yellow (inflatable) octopus for Travis's birthday (highly entertaining and involved lots of drinking and lots of jumping, diving and flipping, happy days), and a second, a day on Harvey's speed boat - The Beast (really, it has two massive 250 engines, to put that into perspective we sped past a police speed boat that bragged 2 x 90, really, its a beast). Admittedly not a relaxing ride but the only way to tour the New Territories .... do I know the right people or what! I really really can't complain.

However none of that is very important when you wake up with wrinkled fingers and toes having been sweating profusely all night (nice), having felt sh*t for a couple of days and you go to the bathroom and you piss blood!

Sorry to just drop that in there but the title should of warned you. Needless to say I was a little concerned, especially as I've not health insurance (d'oh!). I’ll ease your worries immediately, don't worry, I’m still alive!

After the initial shock and then a few hours in work (I had to blag a presentation to chairwoman, brilliant, haha) and then a little over 7 hours in A&E my guess that I'd given myself heat exhaustion (actually verging on heat stroke apparently) was confirmed and I'd not managed to get some evil STD version of the immaculate conception so all is good again. On the down side I’ve been advised not to drink for a while and I’ve now taken my first ever sick day. On the up side I've vowed never ever be sick again, having tried it I can now safely say it stinks!

So, no drink until the world cup final weekend, I can think of worse ways of celebrating being able to drink again than the Mighty might England bringing it home!

Laters

JP


PS. Thanks for the second opinion Jane, who needs insurance when I have you!


Jonathan
Ultra Group
Causeway Bay
HK

Traveling in China

The journey to Guilin started fairly well, Meagan got me a bus ticket to Nanjing where I spent most of the day. I climbed the thousands of steps to the Mausoleum of Dr Sun Yat-Sen (founder of modern China) before then moving on to the Purple Mountain. I could've climbed that as well but instead took a 30 min chair lift to the top, took in the views of the city rode back down before heading to the airport where I picked up the ticket I booked online and checked in, easy.

Unfortunately I then got a call saying I'd not got a ticket.

After explaining I'd already checked I convinced the caller everything was ok only to be called back to be told I'd not paid, d'oh! I unchecked in then spend forever trying to get a receipt for the cash payment they wanted - apparently cash receipts are illegal in China but as I'd been told I'd paid on cc earlier... Eventually with 15 min to go before take off I got it and went to board the plane.

I've never had a plane be delayed, that is until now... Once in the air the lack of a hangover made it far better from my flight to Shanghai and after hours of turbulent flying we landed. Although I didn't understand the announcements it was clear something was wrong and eventually I discovered I was hours late and in the wrong city!

After another hour or so waiting outside the now closed airport I was taken to a hotel and after 3 hours there was woken and I guessed at the instructions to have breakfast, check out and then took a second delayed flight on to Guilin, woohoo. Having said all that I have admit I rather enjoyed the ordeal, getting by without understanding a word or having been understood the entire way!

Guilin was nice and I'd probably of raved about it had I not then taken a riverboat through some amazing scenery to Yangshuo. Yangshuo is fantastic.

In the three days there I saw an amazing light and water display, almost died climbing the moon hill in flip-flops, explored the 3km long water caves (also known as mud caves, apparently its good for the skin!) cycled around the mountains plus passing the nights away playing dice and having beer shot contests with the ever friendly locals. Oh yes, and eating a small yapper type dog, class!

And that was my little trip, having stayed away an extra day I took the night bus (with flat beds..) back to Shenzen then the KTR to HK I discovered a letter from the immigration office asking for more information (that landed the day I left, d'oh!) so need so sort that tomorrow, unfortunately it mean I'll probably not be working for a few more weeks but I'm sure I'll cope.

Laters

Jonathan

News from the PRC

China’s internet connection and filters are worse than Zimbabwe’s, really.. I tried posting this three times and it's been blocked each time and I'm not even spreading cap1tal1st pr0paganda. This therefore the short short version posted in HK and backdated.

OK, Shanghai - loved it, Meagan (my Aussie mate from Africa that lives in China) met me off the coach and we did the full tour, Dongtai Lu antique (aka junk) markets, the Bund, drinks on the 87th floor of the Grand Hyatt, Yuyuan Gardens plus... eating ducks chins, following groups of people wearing their pajamas about town, crossing pelican crossings that gave you the green light to go but not the cars the red one to stop and riding a train (yes a train) down a pedestrian tunnel that closely resembled a kaleidoscope!

I then headed Huaian, Meagan's Chinese home town in the middle of nowhere. Now if the bus ride there wasn't enough (rolling pick-ups - would of been illegal to actually stop, more undertaking on the hard shoulder than overtaking and a 200 decibel horn going none stop) then the lengths Meagan and her 4 English teaching (none Chinese) friends have gone to to find fun there sorted it all out.

Drunken bowling, bouncy dance floors, late night karaoke, even later night BBQ'd meat (really didn't want to ask the origin...) along with sitting in on one of Meagan's classes, brilliant.

Apparently in the eyes of 18 year old Chinese girls, totally sheltered from the really world, and with the build up that I'm a successful marketing man in HK I'm very handsome. On top of that I achieved something no one that has very taught me would believe, I got a spontaneous round of applause for reading!!! I say again, I love China!

And then it was on to Guilin where I now find myself fighting with limited internet access, however the journey here is a story in itself so I'll save it for now.

Laters

Jonathan


Jonathan Partington
Internet cafe
Guilin
People's Republic of China
http://jonathanstravels.blogspot.com